You Can't Take it With You.

I've been so responsible. How could I allow myself to overdraft in my account? I'm really hangin by a thread until payday. Fortunately, now that I have two jobs, I will make up for that deficit very, very quickly. I'm not worried or stressed about it anymore, although it is slightly perturbing. But, it's only money. I'm not leaving this earth with anything except my soul, anyway.

I do believe, ladies and gents, that I am, well, growing up.

For the first time since, well, 7th grade, I am not being pursued by a man or find myself being interested in a man. It's uh..pretty awesome. My roommate has a lovely boyfriend, and everywhere around me people are getting married or engaged or paired off somehow, and yet I remain still. Completely free. My circumstances and my choices are allowing me to be totally independent. My, it's marvelous.

Sure, I can't help but feel a short twinge of envy every now and then but really, I much prefer my books to any sort of gentlemanly company lately.

I'm healing, I'm growing, I'm learning, I'm moving on, I'm growing up.

I went to bed last night around midnight and woke up around 8:30. I worked on my research, enjoyed a cup of granola and organic yogurt, and got ready for work.I'm working at Hi-Health today from 12:30-9:30. I helped a woman buy a cleanse and some natural herbs for her memory and brain support. I helped a woman yesterday with circulatory disorders, diabetes, and high cholesterol. This job is so rewarding. I'm quitting Starbucks at the end of July. I'm so ready. I love that place and the family that I've made there, but it is time to move on. I can't believe it's been four and a half years.

Somewhere out there, somewhere treading the ground at this very moment, somewhere driving in a car, behind a shop window, in a coffee shop or standing in an elevator, he's there.I hope he likes Shakespeare.

 

A bit of a new beginning.

Hello my name is Ellyn and it's been over a year since I've been in a play....

Wow. Over a year. A YEAR?? This is the longest I've gone without being in a play or some sort of theatrical project since I was in 7th grade. Good gracious. It's amazing, if you're away from something for too long, you begin to doubt if you ever did it at all. I think to myself, "Did I really stand up on that stage and sing Sondheim?? How did I memorize all those lines? How did I not fall flat on my face under those hot lights, wearing that atrociously heavy costume and prancing around in heels on that precarious wooden set?? How did I manage to have that much nerve night after night??"

When I think about it like that, I get real scared. Real scared, ladies and gents. It's time for Ellyn to be in a show. Unfortunately, since I now have two jobs, a new car and I'm living on my own, I don't really have a whole lot of time (or financial wherewithal) to participate in one.

I'm considering taking another year off next year. The idea of failure mildly frightens me, but it's not enough to make me seriously consider ducking my head down and finishing my degree. I'll  never know if I would have failed if I don't try.

That's all for now, folks.


Gettin' a little lonely what with all these marriages and romances going on. Not much, though. I guess, I just, I know that I've felt like I've missed the boat with one guy in particular, but in reality, it just wasn't meant to be. I just haven't met 'the one' yet because he's not done gettin ready for me! And I'm certainly not done gettin ready for him.

As Johnny Bravo would say, "I'm pretty, you're pretty, let's go home and stare at each other."

See ya.